letters from a dreamer

...and other lovely thoughts

Sunday, December 27, 2009

some semblance of poetry

Your Absent Love Has an Echo
by Jessica K. Shannon


It's so crazy to me now.
I let you slip right through my fingers.
Never even giving you the chance you so deserved.

Because you loved me like no one has ever dared to love me.
Most of the time without hope or encouragement.

And now I'm silently willing you to come back.

Come back to me.

Just come back.

{this time i'll let you in.}

And how could that ever work,
When it was me that sent you away?

Still my aching, too late heart, yearns for yours.

You'd hold me so well,
So much better than anyone else has ever dared.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

"I might just change your life..."



sitting on a park bench
jessica k. shannon

immersed in yates and plath
i sit. entranced by the page.
tears threaten to steal past
my lashes.
i lose the battle.

a flash turns my gaze.
he had captured my tear-stained face.
"delete it?" i pleaded.
he complied. it didn't matter
he had a picture of me in his mind.

this boy. frustratingly distracting.
the self-proclaimed know-it-all type;
impertinent, imposing.
gorgeous.

compliments sputter off
his tongue. blue eyes linger
as if he's found me,
as if my shipwrecked soul
sought refuge on his sand.

the walls of my vessel begin
to weaken as i listen to every
love-breathed word.
a perfect stranger read my heart;
no one else had ever tried.

his lips speak of future
and past times.
events we've never shared.
secrets, memories free from lies.

"is he mad?" i question.
whatever his mantra, i am captivated.
"i might just change your life," he whispers.
reaching for his hand, i take him at his word.


Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Daffodils



Daffodils stand for unrequited love; the type of love I am all too familiar with. I just came across this new artist, Adele. She's British, and her lyrics seem to match my life right now. SO, I decided to post three of her song lyrics here, because well, they put into words exactly how I'm feeling. I only hope to one day express myself as effectively.



<3 *lyrics in bold are most important; i feel like i wrote them.




First song----> Melt My Heart to Stone

Right under my feet there's air made of bricks
Pulls me down turns me weak for you
I find myself repeating like a broken tune
And I'm forever excusing your intentions
And I give in to my pretendings
Which forgive you each time

Without me knowing
They melt my heart to stone

And I hear your words that I made up
You say my name like there could be an us
I best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love
I'm the only one in love

Each and every time I turn around to leave
I feel my heart begin to burst and bleed
So desperately I try to link it with my head
But instead I fall back to my knees
As you tear your way right through me
I forgive you once again
Without me knowing
You've burnt my heart to stone

And I hear your words that I made up
You say my name like there could be an us
I best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love
I'm the only one in love

Why do you steal my hand
Whenever I'm standing my own ground
You build me up, then leave me dead

Well I hear your words you made up
So I say your name like there could be an us
I best tidy up my head, I'm the only one in love
I'm the only one in love



Second song-----> Best For Last

Wait, do you see my heart on my sleeve?
It's been there for days on end and
It's been waiting for you to open up
Just you baby, come on now
I'm trying to tell you just how
I'd like to hear the words roll out of your mouth finally
Say that it's always been me

That's made you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more
Then you'd say all of the right things without a clue
But you'd save the best for last
Like I'm the one for you

You should know that you're just a temporary fix
This is not rooted with you it don't mean that much to me
You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free
How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me

Why is it every time I think I've tried my hardest
It turns out it ain't enough cause you're still not mentioning love
What am I supposed to do to make you want me properly?
I'm taking these chances and getting away

And though I'm trying my hardest you go back to her
And I think that I know things may never change
I'm still hoping one day I might hear you say

I make you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more

Then you'd say all of the right things without a clue
But you'd save the best for last

Like I'm the one for you


You should know that you're just a temporary fix
This is not rooted with you it don't mean that much to me
You're just a filler in the space that happened to be free
How dare you think you'd get away with trying to play me

But, despite the truth that I know
I find it hard to let go and give up on you
Seems I love the things you do
Like the meaner you treat me the more eager I am
To persist with this heartbreak and running around
And I think that I know things may never change
I'm still hoping one day I might hear you say

I make you feel a way you've never felt before
And I'm all you need and that you never want more
And we'll say all of the right things without a clue
And you'll be the one for me and me the one for you



Third song-----> Chasing Pavements

I've made up my mind,
No need to think it over,
If i'm wrong I aint right,
No need to look no further,
This ain't lust,
This is love but,

If i tell the world,
I'll never say enough,
Cause it was not said to you,
And thats exactly what i need to do,
If i'm in love with you,

Should i give up, Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?

Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

I'd build myself up,
And fly around in circles,

Wait then as my heart drops,

and my back begins to tingle
finally could this be it

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?
Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere

Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere,
Or would it be a waste?
Even If i knew my place should i leave it there?
Should i give up,
Or should i just keep chasing pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere





...I think I'd chase pavements forever if they eventually led me to you.







"and i hear your words that i made up.."


What I Made You Be
by Jessica K. Shannon


You are something predictable,
Quite addictive.
An unfulfilling, every day mistake.

Your simple words become poetry;
Your friendly touch, a sign.
My naive little heart would do anything
To make you mine, to make you mine.

{One thing's for sure... I fell in love with what I made you out to be.}

You give me pieces of yourself that you can spare;
The kind you don't mind to see disappear.


My hear twists to understand,
Why you think of me at all,
Why you find joy in watching me fall

{One thing's for sure... I fell in love with what I made you out to be.}

Haven't I made myself clear?
I can't have you near me;
It just isn't fair.

Just stop. Stop clutching
My heart with your polite gestures.
Tell me to back off;
Treat me like everyone else.

{One thing's for sure... I fell in love with what I made you out to be.}

I just want to know why you keep me hanging on.




Monday, January 19, 2009

didn't want to have to say this..



you've got me stained.
by jessica k. shannon

coffee and ink
won't suffice;
t
he marks on my heart
aren't erasable.

they're insatiable.


i chose to believe,
you had a taste for caffeine,
and wrote
with the same pen as my heart did.

under the surface,
i knew my thoughts
were counterfeit.
carbonation and colored pencils are more your style.

but i tried to fit you; i vainly strove

to put the pieces of our puzzle
side
by side. pieces that just don't belong.

yet i still like the taste of you;

in fact, you've got me stained.

stained so deep, i don't remember

what color i was when i began.


do you like me better this shade?

doesn't matter, however you view me

the hue of my heart stays the same.